:)

The last 20+ days have gone by wayyy too quickly.
I've spent my time learning zulu, working in the vegetable garden, helping out at the daycare, going to school with the bus to pick up the kids, and just trying to be available to them you know?

But mostly, I've been spending time with the housemothers- talking about the difficulties they face, about the various backgrounds of the children and hanging out with the older girls- most of the time not saying anything, just enjoying each others presence.. and being embraced by the solidarity of sisterhood.. i know its kind of cheesy, but I don't really know how to describe it.

It's like...

when you feel a connection
that blooms into affection
the action
of spending time together
will result no matter
how brief the first encounter
might have been.
This path would seem
a common road to most who lean
towards companionship.
Friendship, relationship, whatever the ship
is most enjoyed
with someone you feel that connection with.
And though near or far
these people are
the ones who keep your heart beating,
reminding you of what livin g
feels like.

Let me just paint a picture for you. It's unbelievably sunny and hot. The grass has never looked so green nor the sky so blue. you run to the shade of a tree by a stoop of a house to take a break from the sun beating on your back. The little kids are at daycare and the bigger kids at school so its quiet enough to hear the myriad of birds and bugs. The housemother who lives in the house comes out and we chat. Then a song comes on the radio and we start singing to it together. I pick up a broom and start sweeping while she fills up the pail to mop. Once she starts mopping, I pick up the knitting I left on her kitchen table from the day before and continue making a scarf which will eventually belong to her. She shouts across to the other house to another housemother to come over -"wozala" and we put up the wet laundry on the line together.

When the little ones get out of school, you roll around the grass together, run, jump, and skip around in smiles.

But its the night time you love the most. Helping with dinner preparations, getting to eat zulu food everyday- phutu/mealie, samp and beans... gathering around the tv together to watch the 8oclock soap(y). Then when the little ones go to bed, its just you, the housemother, and the older girls. You turn the tv down but leave the screen on, turn the radio up and the lights out and just sit there talking about life while you watch the changing lights from the television bouncing off everyone's faces.

I don't want to leave. I never expected to want to leave. But even though this feeling of the eventuality of reality is anticipated, it doesn't make it any less dreaded and the ache in my heart becomes the unpleasant indication.